Post by Uesugi-dono on Dec 10, 2017 12:25:42 GMT
I don't usually obsess about celebrities... so let's call this what it is: lust. I mean I admire other celebrities too but a meeting with Hulk Hogan kinda popped that cherry years ago with a dismissive "Really man? That's incredible," response to my shy admission that he had been my hero since the early 80s.
Anyway, you're not here for that. You're here for teh hottiez. Let's start.
Honorable Mention: Su-Metal
Famed for: Babymetal’s lead singer
About: Nakamoto Suzuka is nearly 20 years old now but has been with Babymetal since she was just 13.
My Obsession: My obsession is not necessarily with Suzuka-chan… it is with Su-Metal. The Jo-sama (Queen) of Metal is bold, cruel-looking, and commands goddamn respect. I had a dream that she flat out abducted me, made me her slave, and wouldn’t let me go home to my family. I gotta admit; it was a pretty nice dream. I was torn.
What would I do if I met a receptive Su-Metal?: This depends entirely on if I met Su-Metal or Suzuka. Faced with Suzuka, even dressed as Su-Metal, I’d probably blush, take a pic, and throw up the Fox sign. Before Su-Metal I would do as my Queen commands.
#5: Grace Park
Famed for: Mostly Battlestar Galactica
About: Grace Park is a Canadian-American actress best known for BSG and Hawaii 5-0
My Obsession: Probably the oldest celebrity obsession I have, Grace Park was easily 20% of the reason I watched BSG at all (with 10% being Tricia Helfer, 15% being that chance to see either naked, and the remaining 55% being the desperate hope of a threesome with both.) While her irl personality can be… troublesome, she certainly is nice to look at.
What would I do if I met a receptive Grace Park?: This one has lost its edge over the years and if I met Grace today I would probably have a flirty night at an expensive restaurant or some fancy soiree.
#4: Lzzy Hale
Famed for: Lead singer of Halestorm
About: Elizabeth Mae Hale co-founded Halestorm in 1997
My Obsession: I want Lzzy Hale to fuck me with her voice. I am ashamed to admit that I have been aware of Halestorm for years, even familiar with a few songs, but I really didn’t get into them until this spring when I started listening to them while I was grilling using Amazon Music. She seems like my favorite ex-girlfriend that I never had.
What would I do if I met a receptive Lzzy Hale?: Probably get shit-faced drunk and have a night that we both can’t remember but that I could never forget.
#3: Olivia Munn
Famed for: Being our resident Goddess/Mascot
About: Lisa Olivia Munn is the half-Chinese G4 hostess-turned-actress and all around Geek Goddess
My Obsession: You knew she would be on here. Mmm, Olivia. Absolutely delicious Olivia, and just crazy enough to really ruin my life. (If you’ve paid attention to me at all over the last decade you know I have fatal attraction to crazy.)
What would I do if I met a receptive Olivia Munn?: Man, what wouldn’t I do? I would likely be helpless before Olivia and would submit to whatever crazy-ass thing I imagine she could ask me to do… and I can imagine quite a lot.
#2: HyunA
Famed for: The redhead from Gangnam Style
About: Kim Hyun-Ah is South Korea’s Madonna; a scandalous sex kitten who tempts young minds with her sultry dance.
My Obsession: She was cute in Gangnam Style but it was Change that solidified an obsession. The way she moved, man, and she did my favorite thing: wet Asian female. That and she illustrates my point about Korean women being some of the hottest on the planet.
What would I do if I met a receptive Hyuna?: Dude, I would likely ruin my marriage. I mean I could eat a peach for hours, you know?
#1: Kavka Shishido
Famed for: A Japanese model turned drummer/singer… or maybe the other way around
About: Shishido Yuuna is (wait for it) a Mexican by birth. (Say what??) But beyond the land of her birth she is all Japanese, having moved back for grade school. She earned the nickname Kavka (after the Czech word for the daurian jackdaw) for her penchant for wearing black and uses it now as her stage name for her band. Naturally shy she says she wears black to make her feel strong.
My Obsession: This one is brand new and, boy, did she shoot up the list. I can’t even put my finger on it but something about her allures me, the hair, the skin, the way she says “darling” at 4:14 in this video… whatever the reason I cannot stop thinking about her.
What would I do if I met a receptive Kavka Shishido?: I can’t even say. Whatever she wants? I dunno, this one is maybe less lust and more infatuation; whatever I just wanna be near her… and then definitely get closer. Maybe the illusion would disappear in real life but at the moment she like some raven angel ideal. Out of all of these this particular one would probably trigger wifely discomfort the most; after all Kavka is relatively conservative; no skimpy images out there. For all intents and purposes she is a 'normal' Japanese girl (aside from fame etc) and so this one can't be chalked up to a desire for mere sex.
Anyway, you're not here for that. You're here for teh hottiez. Let's start.
Honorable Mention: Su-Metal
Famed for: Babymetal’s lead singer
About: Nakamoto Suzuka is nearly 20 years old now but has been with Babymetal since she was just 13.
My Obsession: My obsession is not necessarily with Suzuka-chan… it is with Su-Metal. The Jo-sama (Queen) of Metal is bold, cruel-looking, and commands goddamn respect. I had a dream that she flat out abducted me, made me her slave, and wouldn’t let me go home to my family. I gotta admit; it was a pretty nice dream. I was torn.
What would I do if I met a receptive Su-Metal?: This depends entirely on if I met Su-Metal or Suzuka. Faced with Suzuka, even dressed as Su-Metal, I’d probably blush, take a pic, and throw up the Fox sign. Before Su-Metal I would do as my Queen commands.
#5: Grace Park
Famed for: Mostly Battlestar Galactica
About: Grace Park is a Canadian-American actress best known for BSG and Hawaii 5-0
My Obsession: Probably the oldest celebrity obsession I have, Grace Park was easily 20% of the reason I watched BSG at all (with 10% being Tricia Helfer, 15% being that chance to see either naked, and the remaining 55% being the desperate hope of a threesome with both.) While her irl personality can be… troublesome, she certainly is nice to look at.
What would I do if I met a receptive Grace Park?: This one has lost its edge over the years and if I met Grace today I would probably have a flirty night at an expensive restaurant or some fancy soiree.
#4: Lzzy Hale
Famed for: Lead singer of Halestorm
About: Elizabeth Mae Hale co-founded Halestorm in 1997
My Obsession: I want Lzzy Hale to fuck me with her voice. I am ashamed to admit that I have been aware of Halestorm for years, even familiar with a few songs, but I really didn’t get into them until this spring when I started listening to them while I was grilling using Amazon Music. She seems like my favorite ex-girlfriend that I never had.
What would I do if I met a receptive Lzzy Hale?: Probably get shit-faced drunk and have a night that we both can’t remember but that I could never forget.
#3: Olivia Munn
Famed for: Being our resident Goddess/Mascot
About: Lisa Olivia Munn is the half-Chinese G4 hostess-turned-actress and all around Geek Goddess
My Obsession: You knew she would be on here. Mmm, Olivia. Absolutely delicious Olivia, and just crazy enough to really ruin my life. (If you’ve paid attention to me at all over the last decade you know I have fatal attraction to crazy.)
What would I do if I met a receptive Olivia Munn?: Man, what wouldn’t I do? I would likely be helpless before Olivia and would submit to whatever crazy-ass thing I imagine she could ask me to do… and I can imagine quite a lot.
#2: HyunA
Famed for: The redhead from Gangnam Style
About: Kim Hyun-Ah is South Korea’s Madonna; a scandalous sex kitten who tempts young minds with her sultry dance.
My Obsession: She was cute in Gangnam Style but it was Change that solidified an obsession. The way she moved, man, and she did my favorite thing: wet Asian female. That and she illustrates my point about Korean women being some of the hottest on the planet.
What would I do if I met a receptive Hyuna?: Dude, I would likely ruin my marriage. I mean I could eat a peach for hours, you know?
#1: Kavka Shishido
Famed for: A Japanese model turned drummer/singer… or maybe the other way around
About: Shishido Yuuna is (wait for it) a Mexican by birth. (Say what??) But beyond the land of her birth she is all Japanese, having moved back for grade school. She earned the nickname Kavka (after the Czech word for the daurian jackdaw) for her penchant for wearing black and uses it now as her stage name for her band. Naturally shy she says she wears black to make her feel strong.
My Obsession: This one is brand new and, boy, did she shoot up the list. I can’t even put my finger on it but something about her allures me, the hair, the skin, the way she says “darling” at 4:14 in this video… whatever the reason I cannot stop thinking about her.
What would I do if I met a receptive Kavka Shishido?: I can’t even say. Whatever she wants? I dunno, this one is maybe less lust and more infatuation; whatever I just wanna be near her… and then definitely get closer. Maybe the illusion would disappear in real life but at the moment she like some raven angel ideal. Out of all of these this particular one would probably trigger wifely discomfort the most; after all Kavka is relatively conservative; no skimpy images out there. For all intents and purposes she is a 'normal' Japanese girl (aside from fame etc) and so this one can't be chalked up to a desire for mere sex.