Post by Uesugi-dono on Apr 21, 2019 10:50:45 GMT
Being exiled is... unhappy. Sitting in this dusty, lightless prison for 12 hour shifts with no internet is the kind of punishment CIA operatives think up. The mind gets... elastic.
Many days I just sat with my eyes closed until the phone rang or someone talked on the radio. I have classwork too, but it is of the mind-numbing variety. I reread my novels... all of them. I reread all the D&D stuff I have here at work. I wrote up new games that will never be played. Mostly I just sat, angry and depressed, and waited until I could get back home and play games.
Since January I have been trying to not eat carbs. In November I hit 208 lbs. That's a lot for a guy who swore he would never allow himself to hit 200. To give perspective I should weigh 150 lbs. I did, when I started this job, but sitting here, lathered in boredom for most of my life... a fella eats. That's why the majority of dispatchers are, no shit, obese. We are stressed, sleep-deprived, and bored. So we eat. Every single person who has ever left here loses a LOT of weight.
I was really good at it until March 17th, when I allowed my first cheat day. I had gone from 208 to 178 in 76 days with NO exercise and eating until I was full. I snacked voraciously on beef jerky. My back felt better, I felt better. I deserved to cheat. I did. Then I did on my birthday, the 18th. Then I kept sneaking in little cheats; a handful of chips here, a piece of chocolate there, the occasional beer. All that meant that from 3/17-4/17 all I lost was 4 lbs. I've lingered at 174 for way too long. Today I weigh 172, but as I write this I've just finished up a plate of fried chicken skin and cookies.
Why am I this weak?
Today begins The Fuckening. My Fuckening begins earlier than my co-workers; the last 9 days of April I work 6 of them as 12 hour shifts and my only day off is sandwiched between dual 12 hour shifts. By the time the actual Fuckening begins I may be dead of exhaustion. The true Fuckening is May. There will be 5 of us to cover 6 daily shifts. I don't know how many of you are good at math but I expect I shall be working constant 2am to 2pm shifts with maybe 3 or 4 off days the entire month.
That's depressing, right? So let's talk about video games.
I finished RDR2 and I am fighting an uphill battle not to restart it yet. This was really more than a game, to me and my girls. My five year old says to me the other day "I miss Arthur." All I can say is "I do too, baby. I think we all do." I do have one regret playing the game; I was too good. I wish I had been more of a bastard in the beginning. My first save I was. I passed by cries for help, I robbed and fought, but then I ran afoul of a game bug that caused several characters not to appear at camp. So I restarted, and from that point I did the typical video game hero shtick; I helped everyone who asked, I took the moral high ground, and I had a somewhat banal game overall. I loved it, but next time? Ima be a right bastard.
I am nearing the end (I think) of God Of War. Great game but, even on easy, I struggle at times. I'm probably only using about 40% of his kit just because I can't be bothered to learn it. Oh, and FUCK THEM VALKYRIES. Dorbs, you wanna help me kill Valkyries? I'll shareplay pass you the controller because I FUCKING HATE THEM.
It shouldn't be a surprise to anyone that For Honor still monopolizes my time. I retired from my community post of Viking Warchief after Solanna was passed over as Queen. It was overdue, since my ban prevented me from really participating in war planning, but it really left a hole in my life. Much of my identity got caught up in being the Warchief. I loved it. It was the reason why I played the game! I still love For Honor (sort of, wait for it) but my playtime is steadily decreasing.
Meet Jason VandenBerghe, the father of For Honor. Jason witnessed a HEMA fight years ago and it sent him on a 10 year long crusade to create For Honor. Now HEMA uses the same techniques and training that I used when I fought for Stormy Knights, and that is exactly how For Honor's fight system works too. It is recognizable to me from my training and it probably why I like the game so much. Jason got fucked by Ubisoft right before the game was released and the shit-swilling Roman Campos-Oriola, a literal Chad, took his place as Creative Director. This is detailed in heartbreaking detail in the documentary Playing Hard which is on Netflix. Jason and I have a LOT in common. We are like kindred souls, that much is evident from just hearing him talk. What they did to Jason, what they took from him... now that I know... it is a lot harder for me to enjoy For Honor. The documentary has really soured me on the game. This man, so much like me, created the game HE wanted to play, the game I have played the most. More than Skyrim, more than any other game. I have untold hours logged in For Honor. This man, in his moment of triumph and glory, had his baby stolen from him. Where he should have been lauded and recognized and honored... Roman was in his place. (Roman is a genuine bag of little, flaccid dicks.) I haven't been able to stomach playing since I finished the documentary. I know I'll come back to it, it's like an abusive relationship at this point, but man... I feel for Jason.
I finished the EXCELLENT Spider-Man. If you own a PS4 then you need to own this game. This game ought to come with all new PS4s. What a great story. Would have made an excellent movie. I am automatically sold on a sequel and I'll probably get the DLC, though with my backlog I'm waiting for a sale.
Meet Kana, my Hyrkanian. I've got her all dressed up for you because, in my game of Minecraft: The Adult Edition, she is always topless (Hey, TidusandYuna1983 , that's a link!) Conan: Exiles is wearing on my patience though. I play alone because other people suck but I have put a dozen to twenty hours in this game and I still haven't managed to complete my house. FUCK ROOFING! Literally, I have had NO adventures. I don't even know if there is anything to do in this game besides build and hunt for food.
My latest obsession is one that TonberryKing will certainly approve of! In an effort to stave off the inevitable RDR2 replay I watched Kingsglaive (which is a damn good movie!) and Brotherhood and then dove headfirst into FFXV and, I must say, I am loving it. I'm a little lost and not very good at it, but I love the whole endless roadtrip aspect of it. I just wish I could link the Regalia's radio to actual songs on a harddrive because old MIDI tunes and wordless classical is getting king of old. I tried to play this around Christmas the year it came out; watched Kingsglaive in Japanese with my wife and then started the game in Japanese. This is standard fare for me; Japanese with English subs. But Kingsglaive was hard to follow in Japanese and the game.... impossible. They just talk too much. I am enjoying it SO much more in English.
So, anyway, that's me recently. Pretty much all I've been doing.
Many days I just sat with my eyes closed until the phone rang or someone talked on the radio. I have classwork too, but it is of the mind-numbing variety. I reread my novels... all of them. I reread all the D&D stuff I have here at work. I wrote up new games that will never be played. Mostly I just sat, angry and depressed, and waited until I could get back home and play games.
Since January I have been trying to not eat carbs. In November I hit 208 lbs. That's a lot for a guy who swore he would never allow himself to hit 200. To give perspective I should weigh 150 lbs. I did, when I started this job, but sitting here, lathered in boredom for most of my life... a fella eats. That's why the majority of dispatchers are, no shit, obese. We are stressed, sleep-deprived, and bored. So we eat. Every single person who has ever left here loses a LOT of weight.
I was really good at it until March 17th, when I allowed my first cheat day. I had gone from 208 to 178 in 76 days with NO exercise and eating until I was full. I snacked voraciously on beef jerky. My back felt better, I felt better. I deserved to cheat. I did. Then I did on my birthday, the 18th. Then I kept sneaking in little cheats; a handful of chips here, a piece of chocolate there, the occasional beer. All that meant that from 3/17-4/17 all I lost was 4 lbs. I've lingered at 174 for way too long. Today I weigh 172, but as I write this I've just finished up a plate of fried chicken skin and cookies.
Why am I this weak?Today begins The Fuckening. My Fuckening begins earlier than my co-workers; the last 9 days of April I work 6 of them as 12 hour shifts and my only day off is sandwiched between dual 12 hour shifts. By the time the actual Fuckening begins I may be dead of exhaustion. The true Fuckening is May. There will be 5 of us to cover 6 daily shifts. I don't know how many of you are good at math but I expect I shall be working constant 2am to 2pm shifts with maybe 3 or 4 off days the entire month.
That's depressing, right? So let's talk about video games.
I finished RDR2 and I am fighting an uphill battle not to restart it yet. This was really more than a game, to me and my girls. My five year old says to me the other day "I miss Arthur." All I can say is "I do too, baby. I think we all do." I do have one regret playing the game; I was too good. I wish I had been more of a bastard in the beginning. My first save I was. I passed by cries for help, I robbed and fought, but then I ran afoul of a game bug that caused several characters not to appear at camp. So I restarted, and from that point I did the typical video game hero shtick; I helped everyone who asked, I took the moral high ground, and I had a somewhat banal game overall. I loved it, but next time? Ima be a right bastard.
I am nearing the end (I think) of God Of War. Great game but, even on easy, I struggle at times. I'm probably only using about 40% of his kit just because I can't be bothered to learn it. Oh, and FUCK THEM VALKYRIES. Dorbs, you wanna help me kill Valkyries? I'll shareplay pass you the controller because I FUCKING HATE THEM.
It shouldn't be a surprise to anyone that For Honor still monopolizes my time. I retired from my community post of Viking Warchief after Solanna was passed over as Queen. It was overdue, since my ban prevented me from really participating in war planning, but it really left a hole in my life. Much of my identity got caught up in being the Warchief. I loved it. It was the reason why I played the game! I still love For Honor (sort of, wait for it) but my playtime is steadily decreasing.
Meet Jason VandenBerghe, the father of For Honor. Jason witnessed a HEMA fight years ago and it sent him on a 10 year long crusade to create For Honor. Now HEMA uses the same techniques and training that I used when I fought for Stormy Knights, and that is exactly how For Honor's fight system works too. It is recognizable to me from my training and it probably why I like the game so much. Jason got fucked by Ubisoft right before the game was released and the shit-swilling Roman Campos-Oriola, a literal Chad, took his place as Creative Director. This is detailed in heartbreaking detail in the documentary Playing Hard which is on Netflix. Jason and I have a LOT in common. We are like kindred souls, that much is evident from just hearing him talk. What they did to Jason, what they took from him... now that I know... it is a lot harder for me to enjoy For Honor. The documentary has really soured me on the game. This man, so much like me, created the game HE wanted to play, the game I have played the most. More than Skyrim, more than any other game. I have untold hours logged in For Honor. This man, in his moment of triumph and glory, had his baby stolen from him. Where he should have been lauded and recognized and honored... Roman was in his place. (Roman is a genuine bag of little, flaccid dicks.) I haven't been able to stomach playing since I finished the documentary. I know I'll come back to it, it's like an abusive relationship at this point, but man... I feel for Jason.
I finished the EXCELLENT Spider-Man. If you own a PS4 then you need to own this game. This game ought to come with all new PS4s. What a great story. Would have made an excellent movie. I am automatically sold on a sequel and I'll probably get the DLC, though with my backlog I'm waiting for a sale.
Meet Kana, my Hyrkanian. I've got her all dressed up for you because, in my game of Minecraft: The Adult Edition, she is always topless (Hey, TidusandYuna1983 , that's a link!) Conan: Exiles is wearing on my patience though. I play alone because other people suck but I have put a dozen to twenty hours in this game and I still haven't managed to complete my house. FUCK ROOFING! Literally, I have had NO adventures. I don't even know if there is anything to do in this game besides build and hunt for food.
My latest obsession is one that TonberryKing will certainly approve of! In an effort to stave off the inevitable RDR2 replay I watched Kingsglaive (which is a damn good movie!) and Brotherhood and then dove headfirst into FFXV and, I must say, I am loving it. I'm a little lost and not very good at it, but I love the whole endless roadtrip aspect of it. I just wish I could link the Regalia's radio to actual songs on a harddrive because old MIDI tunes and wordless classical is getting king of old. I tried to play this around Christmas the year it came out; watched Kingsglaive in Japanese with my wife and then started the game in Japanese. This is standard fare for me; Japanese with English subs. But Kingsglaive was hard to follow in Japanese and the game.... impossible. They just talk too much. I am enjoying it SO much more in English.
So, anyway, that's me recently. Pretty much all I've been doing.
